Spread Kindness: Celebrating National Compliment Day
If you’re reading this, I hope you know that you are valued, you are enough, and you are loved.
January 24, 2023, is National Compliment Day. In the words of my fellow 2016 Valparaiso Brave cast member and dear friend, Paige Shimer, “I’m proud of you.”
Words of affirmation.
They are not one of Dr. Gary Chapman’s 5 Love Languages, they’re good gifts and should be shared generously. Words of affirmation aren’t only for those who are married, partnered, or booed up, but can be used in platonic relationships, business relationships, or interpersonal relationships. Although I won’t discourage anyone from sharing words of affirmation with their fur babies or their plants, there have actually been experiments done showing that complimented plants thrive compared to their wilted, insulted counterparts.
Neither I nor This Is My Brave is being compensated to plug the 5 Love Languages, but I can say they have come in quite handy in different types of relationships, both romantic and professional. Think of it this way, we all have ways we give love and receive love, and a lot of times they don’t always sync up. If you find out how people communicate and give/receive love best, then you can love them the best, and if that’s not the goal, then what is?
Let’s look at it from a few different perspectives:
Partnered relationships:
- “Hey, thanks for loading the dishwasher tonight!”
- “I appreciate it when you start a load of laundry when the hamper is full.”
- “I just want you to know you’re my best friend, and I’m your biggest cheerleader no matter what.”
- “Thanks for listening so well, I’m still working through some things, and I feel like you really see me when you listen so well.”
Platonic relationships:
- “Hey, nice shirt!”
- “Your makeup looks amazing!”
- “That color looks so good on you!”
- “You look happier/less stressed than the last time I saw you.”
Work relationships:
- “Thanks for the feedback! I appreciate your take on things here.”
- “I just wanted you to know I see you working hard every day, and I appreciate your reliability.”
- “Thanks for being such an understanding supervisor. I appreciate it when you see me as a person.”
Keep in mind telling someone to smile more is creepy and unwanted. They don’t care what you want, and they are probably just trying to do their best to get through the day and do their job. If you want to genuinely compliment someone, especially if they’re in a service position, tell them “thanks for being here today. I appreciate you helping to make my day better/easier” or even “in case no one has told you today, you are enough. You are valued. And you are loved.”
Here’s the thing about genuine compliments – you don’t expect anything in return. You’re simply trying to lift someone else up. That’s why I think it’s fun to compliment strangers while walking down the street, in the mall, or on the train. Here’s a nugget of positivity, “I may never see you again, but I hope this helps you feel some love from the world.”
Even though January 24 is officially National Compliment Day, I challenge you to compliment three new people a day, even if one of those people is yourself. Compliment genuinely and generously. Don’t expect anything back.
Remember, you are valued, you are enough, and you are loved.
Love you all, Brave Family!
Marlon Deleon (he/they)
Program Coordinator
This Is My Brave
Resources
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